Tuesday, April 2, 2013

Why I Hate Mona

We have never exactly given proper introduction to our most loyal and least recognized employee, Mona.  Most would consider her to be a model employee.  Quiet, stoic, clean, and cheap.  Mona and I, however, do not see eye to eye.  Mostly because she has no head.  

 Mona is our mannequin.  She has been with us from the start.  And she is a massive thorn in my side.  Dressing and undressing her is a work out beyond anything that Tracy Anderson could throw at you.  She is 35 pounds of dead weight and the bane of my existence.

While we have been busily adding our home decor and furniture categories , Mona has been complacently napping in my hall closet.  We have not curtailed our clothing purchases.  We just really don't want to deal with HER.  Today I awakened Mona from her slumber and was quickly reminded why I had left her in the closet for so long.


1.  She has a 24 inch waist

2. She wears a 32D bra (yes, I measured)

3.  She has magnetic arms that must be pulled off with a great deal of force, making me feel like a wife beater wearing mannequin abuser.  And those damn magnets pinch my hand every time!

4.  She has man paws and by that I mean REALLY abnormally huge hands.  Quite often they don't even fit through the sleeves.

5.  She has a fairly nice bootie for someone who never works out.

6.  She is all in one piece so with every wardrobe change she must be picked up and wrestled with like a drunk college girl.  Here she is on my sofa like she hit every kegger on Frat Row.

Mona, Mona, Mona.  How I despise you.  I did get pics of a few new spring items today.  

Tanner of Carolina Maxi Dress

Alfred Shaheen Tunic and Pant Set

60s Palazzo Pant

I will get these pieces and more listed on the site later this week.  Assuming Mona will be a team player.

Till Next Time,